Behavioral Euthanasia

“I FEEL GUILTY FOR WANTING TO PUT MY AGGRESSIVE DOG DOWN”

This is a phrase I’ve heard many dog owners say before. Behavioral euthanasia is a tough subject—one that’s rarely discussed openly—but it’s an important conversation to have. It’s a reality I’ve faced with clients, fellow trainers, and even friends. If you’re reading this, maybe you’ve had to make this decision for a dog you loved deeply, or perhaps you’re grappling with the possibility right now. That’s why I want to address this head-on: because it shouldn’t be as taboo as it is. Ethical trainers know that, in some cases, behavioral euthanasia is the most humane option. Severe aggression isn’t often something that can be fixed, and sometimes, despite every effort, it becomes the safest and kindest choice.

Living with an aggressive dog is incredibly hard. Unless you’ve experienced it, it’s difficult to understand the relentless stress of being constantly on edge, always hyper-vigilant to prevent a bite or a fight. Maybe you can no longer have people over. Maybe your dog can’t go on walks anymore because it’s not safe. Maybe you have problems with neighbors now because of your dog. Maybe you just live in constant fear of your dog attacking your other dog, biting you, going over the fence and attacking your neighbor or their dogs…

Training and medication can sometimes help—but not always. And if they help, is it enough help? When all avenues have been exhausted (professional training, vet consult, behavior medication, etc) euthanasia may be the answer, though it’s a decision no one takes lightly. It’s a choice that’s agonized over, questioned, and revisited countless times. There’s guilt, self-doubt, and wondering if things could’ve been different. Yet, I’ve seen time and again that this decision, as heartbreaking as it is, often brings relief—the unbearable weight finally lifts, and the constant fear is gone.

Like many trainers, I’ve faced this decision personally. Let me tell you about Koda.

KODA’S STORY

Koda was a beautiful German shepherd.  He was a deaf singleton puppy I got at 6 weeks from a backyard breeder.

I could see behavior issues immediately. At 6 weeks, he had extremely poor dog-dog social skills and was incredibly dog reactive, barking loudly and aggressively at other adult dogs. He had no littermates to practice social skills with, and mom was a dog-reactive dog living on a chain in the backyard spending her days aggressively chasing away passing dogs. In so many ways, he was doomed from the start. Koda was incredibly pushy with my adult dogs and seemed unable to comprehend any kind of body language or social cues.  If they bared teeth at him to stop his relentless biting and jumping - he was unfazed. If they snapped at him, he'd snap back (very abnormal behavior for a young puppy). I could see warning signs very early on, but he also had many moments of sweet playfulness, and I had hope that as a young trainer I could turn this around.

As he grew, we worked hard on his reactivity to strange dogs, and slowly but surely that became more manageable, but I would have an occasional dog fight in my home because of Koda.  He just had no social skills, was becoming a huge bully, and would never, ever make an effort to avoid conflict. He seemed to sometimes seek it out. He would do strange things, like bark and spin in a circle while staring up at the empty sky or jolt awake, run to a wall, and growl and aggressively bark at it.

His aggression didn't become a big problem until he was older, around 5 years old.  His aggression toward my oldest dog, a sweet, submissive girl named Miley, had started to ramp up.  He'd wait for her to walk out the dog door and grab the back of her neck hard enough that she'd cry out. It was bullying behavior that started drifting into full aggression.

Koda, my behavioral euthanasia dog. The best boy except for his unprovoked and severe dog aggression.

The first time he truly attacked her, she was already in the backyard, munching grass along the fence, and Koda had just walked outside.  He visually locked on to her, and I knew immediately this was really bad.  His whole body shifted subtly, and I knew what was coming, but I couldn't grab him in time. I saw the fear in Miley’s face as she realized what was happening, too. He dropped his head, froze, and then sprinted at her silently.  He grabbed the back of her neck (he was 95 pounds, she was 45), picked her up and started shaking her hard.  At this point it's a bit of a blur as I was racing through the yard to grab him, Miley was screaming, and he was barely making a sound as he tried to kill her.  He dropped her for a split second, just long enough to grab her throat instead, and resumed shaking her. I grabbed his hips and yanked him back hard. He refused to let her go, so I just drug them both, over 130 pounds of dog. I grabbed his collar and lifted his front legs off the ground. He still didn't let go of her, so both dogs were lifted. I had to start choking him out before he eventually dropped her. It was horrific. He had never done anything like this before, ever. And I saw the whole thing. There was no trigger. There was no way to rationalize it. This was severe, intense, and unpredictable aggression. If I had not been there he would have killed her. Of that, I have no doubt.

It didn't get better.  And it always happened similarly.  Out of nowhere, he would attack.  Several times he jerked awake from a dead sleep and charged across the living room and tried to kill her.  A few times he attacked her while she was sleeping, so she woke up to him mauling her.  It was severe every time, with him biting, holding, and shaking.  She wouldn't even fight back, just cower and scream for help. The frequency and intensity of the attacks increased.

I did everything I could.  I took him to a veterinary behaviorist to get help from the best of the best.  We tried every single behavioral medication. Some helped calm him down and decrease his intense anxiety, but it didn’t decrease his aggression.  I took him to vets to rule out any kind of medical issue. None were found.  He was still attacking her. He wore a basket muzzle anytime he was loose in the house. He was never outside with her. He spent a lot of time baby gated away from her, which was stressful for him, as he had a hard time being away from me. He still attacked her, and it was always unpredictable and unprovoked.  There was no rhyme or reason.  I didn't know what to do.  Miley was terrified, slinking around the house perpetually fearful of the next attack.  I was always stressed, also afraid of the next attack.

The final straw came after trying for over a year, with the absolute worst attack of all.  If he hadn't been muzzled it would have been so much worse, but even with the muzzle, I could NOT get him to stop attacking her.  Several times I managed to yank him off, but he would jerk himself free of my grasp and resume the attack on her. I fell a couple times. The attack moved through the house, starting in the living room and ending in my bedroom as Miley tried desperately to escape him.   It lasted several minutes (and felt like hours) before I finally managed to grab him and throw him behind the baby gate. As I tried to catch my breath, he threw himself against the gate over and over, snarling and barking, with the most frenzied, desperate look in his eyes I'd ever seen. It wasn't Koda anymore. The sweet dog I knew and loved was not in that body in that moment. I felt like he was pleading with me to help him, that he couldn't control it. I scheduled his euthanasia that night. There was nothing left to try. I couldn't keep doing this. Miley didn't deserve to live this way, and Koda had no quality of life anymore. With his aggression escalating so dramatically, I feared he'd get out of his muzzle or redirect on me.

I gave him a great last day before the vet came to the house and helped him pass. I can remember thinking, as the sedative kicked in, that I'd never seen him so relaxed and at peace, and I realized that he had been in severe emotional distress for far too long. It was devastating and heartbreaking. I cried for months. I missed him. I grieved for him. But I never regretted it.

A beautiful passing is sometimes the kindest and most selfless gift we can give our dogs who are in constant emotional distress.
— Carolyn Martell, CPDT-KA

THE UNICORN HOME

Many owners of aggressive dogs will consider rehoming their dog.  Sometimes this is reasonable. If two dogs are fighting but the dogs do fine with other dogs, it's reasonable to find a new home for one. Or if there’s a dog who resource guards the kids’ toys and nothing else, it may be reasonable to place the dog in a home without kids.

But more often than not, it's not reasonable.  Let's look at the case of the pit bull I worked with who busted through a new wooden fence to kill the neighbor’s dog. Where can this dog safely go? He already lived in a home without other dogs, and he still found a way to kill one. Other dogs exist in the world, and he would go to incredible lengths to kill them. He would need to be muzzled and leashed any time he was outside for the rest of his life - even in his own fenced yard. If he ever slipped out the front door or bolted out of the car, another dog could die. The only person who would want this dog is someone who would use him for fighting.

Puppy Koda. He was very loved his whole life. He was trained and socialized early. He was just not wired right, and even as a young puppy showed concerning behavior.

I consulted with an owner of a giant breed dog who had severely mauled a person. She also had a history of attacking the other dog in the home.  Who wants a dog over 120 pounds who quite literally tried to kill someone? This dog could never safely be around people or dogs, and at her size, good luck trying to hold her back if she decides to go after someone.  To make matters worse, she regularly jumped their 6' fence and roamed around the neighborhood.  She could not be contained and was a deadly serious threat to people and dogs. There is nowhere this dog could go, other than a roofed concrete kennel without human interaction, and what kind of life is that for a dog, especially one who couldn’t tolerate confinement?

“NEEDS TO BE THE ONLY PET - NO KIDS”

Many people think a dog-aggressive dog just needs a home without dogs, or that a dog who is aggressive to people just needs a home where no one ever comes over. But remember, other dogs and other people exist in the world. People have neighbors and mailmen and delivery drivers. People have family and friends. There are utility workers or repairmen who may stop by.

If you walk your dog, they WILL encounter other dogs and people. Take your dog to the vet, same thing.

It only takes one mistake - one door left open, one gate left open, one moment of inattention on a walk.

“HE JUST NEEDS TO LIVE ON A FARM!”

Commonly, people assume farmers want aggressive dogs. They don't. Farmers are busy, hardworking people. They have lots of other animals and usually lots of people around. It's not a place for dangerous dogs. Farmers need dogs who are safe around their livestock and farm dogs and who won’t attack farm workers or family, friends, and guests. Virtually no one wants an aggressive dog, and even fewer are actually capable of safely managing them for life.

THEY JUST NEED TRAINING

If only. Training doesn't fix everything for dogs any more than therapy fixes everything for people. Some people are just dangerous and will be no matter what, and the same is true of dogs. Aggression with no clear trigger, or unpredictable aggression, is incredibly challenging to train. Dogs with severe aggression, who are biting people and doing damage, or dogs who are severely attacking other dogs are simply not safe. The risk of serious injury is just too high.

Sometimes there's just something wrong with the brain that no amount of training will ever be able to fix.  If we did necropsies of every behaviorally euthanized dog, I suspect we would find that many have physical abnormalities.  So while it may be challenging to contemplate euthanizing a physically healthy dog, keep in mind that they may not be physically healthy. Simple labs are not going to detect an issue with the brain.  You could spend $5000 or more doing a brain MRI. But the chances of the problem being fixable are pretty slim anyway. So why let your dog suffer? A dog who is that aggressive is not a happy dog. They don't have a great quality of life, and neither do the people and animals they live with.

I heard a story at a training seminar about a behaviorally euthanized dog. The owners loved this dog dearly. Did everything they could. Did everything right. But ultimately had to put the safety of their child first and had the dog euthanized. They opted for a necropsy, hoping for answers, and boy did they get them. Training hadn’t worked, behavior meds hadn’t worked, management hadn’t worked — because the dog had a significant abnormality involving the brain and spinal cord that were causing him severe pain. His only symptom of pain? Severe and unpredictable aggression. He walked fine. Ran fine. Ate normally. This dog suffered for YEARS with bouts of debilitating pain. It was no one’s fault. But training would have never, ever helped. This dog and this family never stood a chance of making this right.

ARE THERE OTHER OPTIONS? WHAT ABOUT A RESCUE?

Many aggressive dogs are sent to rescues or shelters where they’ll spend their entire life in isolation, highly stressed. Euthanasia is a far kinder option, and no good rescue or shelter would do this to a dog.

So if they can't be ethically rehomed and they can't be safely kept, then what? Do we send them somewhere they'll be isolated for the rest of their lives? A rescue, sanctuary, or shelter where they'll spend years in a kennel, alone, circling and pacing and barking while they lose their minds, never getting to run free and be a dog?

Is that humane and ethical?

I don't think it is. I would personally choose to give my dogs a good death before confining them for life.

And being fully transparent here, a good rescue is not going to take a dangerous dog.

WHEN BEHAVIORAL EUTHANASIA MAY BE WARRANTED FOR AGGRESSIVE DOGS:

  • When the dog has already done serious harm

  • When the dog is likely to do harm - the bigger the dog, the more likely this is

  • When the dog escapes the yard - digging under the fence or jumping it (or does not have a fenced yard at all)

  • When the dog regularly escapes out of the house

  • When there are kids in the home

  • When the home is busy with lots of guests

  • When there is no clear trigger or when the aggression is very unpredictable

  • Any deep punctures or bites to people that require stitches, especially if the dog is biting multiple times in rapid succession or biting and holding/thrashing

  • Any dog fights with injuries that require vet care

  • Any dog attacks where the dog is holding on — or holding on and thrashing (this is a clear intent to kill)

  • When the dog is displaying aggressive behavior toward family in the home

  • If you are living in constant stress due to your dog’s aggression

  • If your quality of life has been impacted by your dog’s aggression

  • If your dog’s quality of life is being negatively affected by their aggression (they’re constantly isolated, they can’t go on walks, they can’t be loose in the backyard, etc)

  • If another dog or person in the home is living in fear of the aggressive dog

Miley, the victim of Koda’s attacks.

HOW DO YOU KNOW IT’S TIME TO EUTHANIZE?

This is hard. It is always hard. Looking back with Koda, I regret waiting so long. With both medical and behavioral euthanasia, we so often feel like we need one last catastrophe to feel justified in our decision. The progression is often so prolonged and subtle that it creeps up unnoticed and we adapt to each slow worsening.

With Sam's medical euthanasia, he had been in pain for months. He could no longer do the things he loved. His quality of life had diminished a lot, but I kept going. He was still eating! I couldn't put him down if he had such a hearty appetite! He still got excited to see me! He was fine! I kept waiting and waiting for that last catastrophic push because what if today was a good day? What if he improved? How could I possibly say goodbye to my very best friend if he was getting better? He’s not THAT bad… So what if day by day he slowly declined?

But why wait until they’re suffering and miserable? Isn’t it better to let them go on a good day or a sort-of-good day? Leave on a good note without being debilitated by pain? That is what every vet has told me.

Sam’s vet explained that a catastrophic event for him would involve the most excruciating pain he’s ever experienced and possible paralysis. Did I want that for him? For his last moments to involve terror at being unable to move and horrific, agonizing pain? Did I want the memory of him screaming and unable to walk to haunt my dreams? No. I let him go on a “good” day. In my lap, in our home. And as hard as it is, that was right for him. We can choose that for our behavior dogs, too. We don’t need to wait for a catastrophic attack.

With Koda’s behavioral euthanasia, it was the same. It took a really, really, really bad attack before I could make up my mind and feel “justified.” I put my other dogs through so much unnecessary trauma, clinging to a shred of hope he'd miraculously get better all of a sudden. He didn't. I simply delayed the inevitable.

You do NOT have to wait for a catastrophe. You don't have to wait for your dog to injure or kill another dog. You don't have to wait for a serious bite to a person. You can choose to say goodbye before then and prevent it from reaching that point. If your dog is a danger to others, it is okay to euthanize before a bite or a bad bite. Severe aggression isn't likely to get better.

FINDING A VET

Not every vet is willing or able to do a behavioral euthanasia. You may need to call around, and that’s okay. Vets get to decide whether to euthanize or not, but that doesn’t mean you’re making the wrong decision - it just means they’re not emotionally able to handle that. Personally, I’ve found most vets to be pretty supportive, and I was able to use an in-home vet who could come perform the euthanasia at my home so we could avoid a stressful vet visit.

Be honest with your vet about your dog’s aggression, especially if they’re aggressive toward strangers. You may want to ask your vet for a sedative you can give your dog prior to your appointment to help them relax. You should also be prepared to muzzle your dog for your vet’s safety (you can remove this after the vet has administered sedatives and your dog is safely asleep).

WHAT TO EXPECT

Some vets may do things slightly differently, but they should explain how the euthanasia will go beforehand. If they don’t, you can always ask if you want details. What it typically looks like is this:

a golden retriever sleeps deeply on a brightly colored blanket
  • The vet will administer a sedative via injection. Your dog will get drowsy within a few minutes and lay down and sleep very deeply. They won’t be aware of what’s happening and they aren’t feeling anything. For some dogs, especially highly anxious or aroused dogs, the sedation will take much longer. Koda took an unusually long time (over 10 minutes) to lie down, and he required a second injection of sedatives. For my senior dogs without anxiety, their sedation took effect very quickly. This is the same sedation your vet gives your dog for getting stitches or an x-ray.

  • Once your dog is sedated and calm and sleeping, your vet will probably insert an IV line into your dog’s vein. They may shave a bit of fur and use a tourniquet to find a vein easier. Your dog is sedated and won’t be scared by this. This may be a front or back leg.

  • They’ll ask you if you’re ready for them to inject the euthanasia cocktail. If you say yes, they’ll slowly inject a lethal dose of anesthetic agents that will peacefully slow and then stop your dog’s heart. They won’t feel a thing, and it usually happens fairly quickly, in under a minute. I have never been able to tell when my dogs have actually passed. It’s always been very peaceful and quick for my dogs.

  • Your vet will listen for a heartbeat with a stethoscope and let you know your dog has passed.

  • After your dog has passed, you can choose to take your dog back home with you and bury them or you can choose to have them cremated. You can either get their cremains back or have the crematorium scatter them for you. If you want cremation, most vet clinics will arrange this for you, contacting the company and arranging pickup so you won’t have to make another call. If you choose to get your dog’s remains back, you’ll need to arrange for that. Some cremation places will return them to your vet clinic while others will have you pick up your dog from them directly. Picking up your dog’s cremains is often very emotionally difficult and can reopen the wound, so be prepared for that.

    I’ve always done in-home euthanasia, and the in-home vet works directly with the cremation company to arrive shortly after she does. I do not have to make a second call, and I get to have as much time as I need with my dog after they have passed. I simply open my front door and let the cremation person know I’m ready. They come in, gently slide a carrying sling with handles under my dog, place a blanket over them, and carry them to their van. Everyone, every step of the way, is supportive and kind. I typically choose to pay the vet for cremation and she pays them. At this point, I’m mentally drained and want everyone to leave so I can cry. The cremation company will call or text you when your dog’s cremains are ready for pickup. Some may deliver them back to you. Fair warning - this may be a very emotional thing for you, getting your dog back. It always reopens the wound for me. Be prepared for this.

AFTER IT’S OVER

After is hard. It always is.

It will feel surreal and empty and sad and weird and absolutely soul-crushing. For all euthanasias there’s a mixture of relief that it’s over, guilt over feeling relief, and so much sadness and loss. You might have periods of feeling numb or feeling like it’s not real — something this awful couldn’t have happened, my dog is just in the other room sleeping! It was all a crazy dream, and he’ll walk out any minute!

You may feel guilt at your decision to euthanize. You may wonder if you could have done something differently - started training sooner, tried more medication, tried another anxiety supplement or training method. You might wrack your brain, frantic for a solution or a cause — a different outcome. The truth is, it probably wouldn’t matter. There will always be something new to try, and you can make yourself crazy wanting to do everything. You’ve tried and that’s enough. The end result would’ve been the same.

There may be judgement from others. You do NOT have to give details if you don’t want to. You can simply tell people your dog has passed. You don’t owe details to anybody. You can say it’s too hard to talk about or say it was a medical issue. Other people may not understand, and that can be really hard when you’re already grieving and raw.

A great support is the Facebook group Losing Lulu - a private support group for post-behavioral euthanasia support. It can help to read the stories of others and talk to other dog owners who understand.

But know this: you did the right thing. Your feelings are normal. All of them. It will be hard but you will be okay.

BEHAVIORAL EUTHANASIA CONSULT

Would you like support or clarity? Would it help to talk things over with a trainer?

During a judgement-free online consult, you can tell me all about your dog and what’s going on, we can talk things through, discuss your options, and provide guidance and support for you during this difficult time. I know it’s a hard place to be, and if you’d like help — I’m here.

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